Life Imitating Seinfeld #1 – Schnitzel Nazi

It seems that everyone knows a Soup Nazi or similar. In our case it’s the Schnitzel Nazi.

Friends and I have discovered a great cafe in the city that specialises in schnitzels.
They mostly do chicken schnitzel sandwiches on your choice of bread and other toppings.They make the best schnitzel sandwiches that I know of. High quality meat rather than the mushed up over processed rubbish you get elsewhere.

Word must have gotten out as they have become quite popular and therefore are pretty busy most lunch-times.
They have a good number of staff so it’s usually still quite fast service though, especially if you get the Schnitzel Nazi.

We can’t be sure but the Schnitzel Nazi seems to be the manager of day to day operations, she certainly gives off the impression that she is in charge.

At lunch-time a line will form and daydreaming or any sort of loss of attention will be frowned upon.  If you are unlucky enough to get the Schnitzel Nazi “next please” will be called out before the last person has had a chance to pick up their food. Do not delay for even a millisecond or a second more forceful “NEXT PLEASE” will be issued.

Sandwiches must be ordered as follows:
– First choose a schnitzel (or salad if thats what you want), do not, I repeat do not forget to advise of bread type.
– Then list all the toppings you want, do not repeat, they heard you the first time.
– If you wanted a drink you should have already got it from the fridge that is hidden away in the corner next to the coffee machine. You can pay for it now and then go and get it but you’re walking on thin ice.
– Quickly hand over the money and once you have your change move out of the way as the next person will have already been ordered to take your place on the production line.

I’m waiting for the day when I hear, “No Schnitzel for you!”